TEACHING THANKFULLNESS

 
- Liane Weintraub, Editor-in-Chief

Raising children is full of paradoxes.  As Thanksgiving approaches and we adults take stock of all that we have to be grateful for, I think more than usual about encouraging thankfulness in my own children.  On the one hand, as parents we all want to give our little ones a sense of warmth and security – the knowledge that they are loved and safe, always.  But we also need to build gratitude within them, so that they don’t take their gifts for granted.  They need to know how  lucky they are to live so richly when so much of the world makes do with so much less, and many people are suffering.

So, how to achieve this balance?!  I’m struggling with it daily.  The last thing I want to do is scare my babies into feeling vulnerable and scared, which can happen so easily.  Images of famine and affliction on television make my daughter visibly nervous (my son is still too young to take it in).  She can’t simply shake it off and go back to her games – and I wouldn’t want her to.  But too much exposure to the pain of others would be overwhelming, so I’m careful about what she sees and hears, and I make sure to answer her questions and thoroughly discuss anything that may have disturbed her.

At 3 ½ she is deeply concerned about the plight of animals.  She worries that the bunnies in the garden get enough to eat (trust me – from the looks of our flower beds, they are well-fed!).  She wants to know if the birds get cold in their nests at night.  She spends her playtime “rescuing” worms and other insects in the yard. 

Her preschool also has a serious commitment to instilling an appreciation in the children, which is wonderful.  At school she learns about poor children living in Africa, and she wants to share with them.  She’s beginning to understand the importance of not being wasteful and is becoming watchful about conserving and recycling. These are such important lessons as they are the foundation for teaching her that she is part of the World – something far bigger than herself.

Now, in spite of all this lesson-learning, pretty much every young child thinks of him or herself as the axis on which the world turns – the Earth and all the planets revolve around their whims.  That’s the hallmark of kids and it’s in equal parts marvelous and exasperating.  The challenge we parents have been given is to let our kids be kids, yet bring reality gently into focus.  I’m delighted that my daughter reads fairytales.  Stories of princesses and “happily-ever-afters” are heart-warming … but more than a little skewed. 

So our theme this Thanksgiving will be some of the tales that are not in those storybooks – nothing too frightening, of course; but it’s never to early for a little perspective.

Teaching thankfulness can be an abstract concept, often difficult for children to understand.  We found a great craft project called the the Thankful Tree, that is a great way for you to spend time with your children and teach them about how they can convey the things they're thankful for in this brightly colored, homemade tree.  We've also compiled a list of some other fun and easy craft projects that are sure to brighten your Thanksgiving table.  You can check them out on our Thanksgiving Kid's Crafts page